13 weeks
Today was better and I could feel the prayers and was able to pray for Michael who was having the bad day today. Thankfully, that is kinda the way God is allowing the grief journey to progress - when one has a bad day the other usually has an okay to good day. The roller coaster continues, but as two different friends reminded me when they checked on me today-His mercies are new every morning.
This morning, I felt a gentle light and a glimmer of hope and thanked God in advance for the butterflies He would send just knowing he would.
I spoke with a friend as I dropped Madison off for art. Earlier in the week, she received a package in the mail at her office and she explained as she handed it to me that she knew it was for me. It was a calendar with beautiful butterfly photography filling its pages.
In the early evening hours after I spent much of the day packing again at our house, I stopped to rent a comedy to take a mental rest from filling boxes with memories of a life that no longer exists. As the movie started, the camera panned a garden landscape where two butterflies darted and dipped and danced on the screen...God keeps gifting me with those butterflies. And on this good day I feel His faithfulness in my bones.
Our God is a good God...all the time even when we feel bad. And maybe I am growing back to knowing that all the time.
This I recall to my mind therefore I have hope. It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed. His compassions fail not. They are new every morning. Great is thy faithfulness.
Thank you for praying.
i still have yesterday's post open, trying to think of words to say. i am so glad that God continues to send you encouragement, beth. i wish i could hug you and share coffee and tears. please know that i am praying for you across the miles. praise God that His mercies are new every morning! new and fresh... never stale, never for yesterday, but for now, for today. and He will give fresh again tomorrow.
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